Welcome to Snacktion News, it’s definitely not live. Our first story is going to cover the crust covered container in Covington.
I have been informed I’ve already reached my alliteration limit for the year. A pizza place employee tossed some dough into the dumpster before Ida hit Louisiana. You’re all caught up now.
NOLA did a great job covering the blob blowing barley out of the bin.
I’ve been fired. Here’s my interview with The Original, The One and Only, Snacktion Reporter, Nicole Amstutz. I don’t know if that’s spelled right, I’ve only recently applied for the payroll job.
MTD: When you were growing up, when did you realize you wanted to be a snacktion reporter? A perfectly salted Cheez-It?
Nicole Aniston: I think it was really just timing. I’m an 80’s baby and growing up seeing the likes of both Geraldo and the Noid on TV is what eventually led to my Mass Comm degree.
MTD: Ugh, the Noid. His antics had to lead to your keen sense of pizza related news.
NA: Undoubtedly they did. They also led to me attempting a Noid costume for 80s weekend at work about two years ago. I couldn’t do it. The suit felt too claustrophobic. So I dressed as Mr T. instead and everybody thought I was Dog the Bounty Hunter.
MTD: Mr T, famous for his ice cream and pizza shop in Chattanooga, sure. What went wrong? The mullet?
NA: My overwhelming blonde whiteness, most likely. I’ll find a picture.
MTD: So what tipped you off to the dominos dumpster dough disaster (gets fired again)?
NA: I evacuated to Covington and drove home after the storm to check on some things. On my way back, I was at one of the no electricity, four way stop intersections that was taking FOREVER, so I was ADHDing and saw it. At first I thought it was that spray foam in a can. You know, Great Stuff (product endorsement deal!?? What do you say, Great Stuff??) and then the context made sense and I took a picture because it was awesome.
MTD: I’ve already checked and Dominos, Pizza Hut and Mel Brooks won’t let me call this Pizza the Hut. What would you call it?
NA: The World’s Biggest Yeast Infection
MTD: Where does your clear role as Snacktion Reporter 1 take you now? Wisconsin?
NA: First I’m going to compile all of the articles and celebrity retweets and whatnot and submit to LSU, since I’m clearly a notable alumna journalist now and thus deserving of a framed portrait of something. Then I’ll probably see if there’s anything funny going on at Arby’s. I mean… they have the meats.
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