Oreos X Ritz Sells Out Immediately

Oreo has sold out yet another multiplying project and left Snacktion News on the outside looking in. First it was the battle between Barefoot wine and Oreo and now it's a rumble ready Ritz cracker sandwich against the over achieving Oreo cookie sandwich.

I came prepared this time. Oreo was going to give away 1000 packs of their Frankensnacksandwich provided you pay the shipping at 12 pm. But alas, the website crashed from 11:55 until 12:17 when they were declared sold out. 

*Snacktion News is located in the Central Time Zone*

Don't fear Snacktionneers, I'll walk you through how to recreate this near inconceivable snack in just a few easy snacks, er steps, as I did with the Barefoot Oreo wine. No blender is required this time. You will need...

1. Oreos and Ritz peanut butter sandwiches

2. A Dremel

3. Protective Eyewear 

4. Keen Understanding of Snack Culture and a Steady Hand

5. A pair of pliers and a blowtorch

You'll need to start by putting on your protective Ray-Bans and plugging in the Dremel. Once you've managed to buzzsaw through the Ritz and Oreo packaging, you should be able to find a few still intact.

Carefully remove the whole Oreos and Ritz from the carnage. The next step is important and you will have to fight your basic instincts. 

Do not just eat it like this. It's the coward's way out. *wipes crumbs off shirt*  We, viewer, are better than that. Now, we'll need to reach deep into our years of snack culture and a steady hand. For the former, it's the old fashioned method of the Oreo twist. A clean, simple counterclockwise twist should remove one cookie clean from the other cookie with filling attached. As for the steady hand, some of our more experienced social drinkers might require the dreaded performance enhancing drug. I prefer Sambuca out of the refrigerator door with three espresso beans. I ooze class but anything will probably do.

You should be left with this. 

This next part ain't rocket science, kids. You just just kind of mash them aaaand I dropped them on the floor.

After repeating the previous steps, I successfully managed to press the two sides together. Which should look like this.

Is it perfect? No. Oreo probably has a nicer Dremel, cookie holder and the technology to make the Ritz the same size as the Oreo but here we are. Is it good?!?

Viewer, I won't lie to you. It tastes like. Imagine if you had a Ritz peanut butter cracker sandwich and an Oreo and somehow, just somehow, had the mouth capacity to eat both at the same time, it tastes like that. The peanut butter works well with the Oreo. The Ritz cracker doesn’t offer up more than the salt component which is always nice. 

But for that amount of work, I could have found at least six more Wordle knock-offs.

Oh, the pliers and blowtorch! That's for you Oreo. Don't snub us again.

Pringles Has A First Name

Snack companies have been naming their frontman for a long time. They want you to feel like you're inviting a friend over to hang out. Then you end up frying your bologna and eating it in the warming glow of reruns of Walker, Texas Ranger. Well, that bologna had a first name, you monster!

The mustachioed man adorning the tube of sour cream and onion Pringles your fist is currently stuck in also has a first name. It's not what you'd expect. Originally just Mr. P because he was so laid back and hip with his potato underlings, Mr. P has a salty backstory to his first name. But before we get to that, let's get our field team to take guesses. 

MTD: The Pringles mascot has a first name. What do you think it is?

Derwood Morris: Why does he need a name?

MTD: Pringles wants you to connect with the face you're eating? We're doing a bit.

DM: Percy

Baaaaaaank. Is that how the Family Feud strike sound effect goes? We can't afford a real clip.

MTD: Nikki?

Nicole Amstutz: Doyle. Is this a fever dream?

Bloooooonk. Better? Also, not a fever dream. These are things I text you.

MTD: Thomas, hit us with it.

Thomas Ridgely: Preston Pringle.

MTD: Much better than the actual name but another zooooooink. That's a Scooby Doo noise. Mike?

Mike Hllywa: Dollar Store Monopoly Guy

MTD: Oh, Mr. P can't afford a monocle and he's a knock off of Rich Uncle Pennybags? To be fair, monocles weren't that expensive back when pennies were a form of currency. 

MH: Fred

Wonkkkkkkk. Seriously, can we just steal the noise from the internet?

MTD: Amber?

Amber Hllywa: Something like Peter or Perry would be too obvious. Mr. Monopoly isn't Mr. Monopoly, it's like Moneybags or something.

MTD: Pennybags, but you get credit for knowing it's not Monopoly Guy.

AH: Helios

MTD: So close! Helios is the Greek God of Sun Chips.

It's Julius. Julius Pringles. I didn't know either before watching this Jeopardy! episode from May 25th. I'm weeks behind due to my quest to solve every Wordle knockoff on the internet. I'm crushing Waffle. 

*10 minutes later*

While this is news to Snacktion News, the story behind Julius Pringles dates back to 2007. Mashable has the full story with the duo that came up with the name Julius if you want to read something. But the short story, viewer, is a Wikipedia user put an edit in the Pringles page alerting researchers across the world that Mr. P's first name was Julius.

Why Julius? The Wikipedia fans were also football fans and made a love match between their snack du jour and Carolina Panthers defensive end Julius Peppers. There was no dispute to this claim. So when Kellogg bought Pringles from Proctor & Gamble in 2013, they took it at face value. The name became official based on a Wikiprank. Kellogg just went with it based on their diligent Wikipedia research. 

My guess was Clark Dent Pringles.